{"id":6206,"date":"2023-09-03T10:55:58","date_gmt":"2023-09-03T10:55:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/finance\/our-older-son-37-is-an-artist-and-puts-1000-a-month-on-our-credit-card-our-other-son-35-is-self-sufficient-is-that-unfair\/"},"modified":"2023-09-03T10:55:58","modified_gmt":"2023-09-03T10:55:58","slug":"our-older-son-37-is-an-artist-and-puts-1000-a-month-on-our-credit-card-our-other-son-35-is-self-sufficient-is-that-unfair","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206","title":{"rendered":"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

Dear Quentin,<\/strong><\/h2>\n

My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The older one is an artist who we partially support. He puts about $1,000 a month on our credit card, and we send him money as needed.\u00a0Our other son is very self-sufficient. <\/p>\n

\n

We\u2019ve been contributing to a Roth IRA for each of them when we can. Our older son needs extra money for now, and our other son prides himself on adulting.\u00a0But sometimes I wonder if we should try to be more evenhanded.<\/p>\n

Maybe I\u2019m overthinking this. I\u2019m grateful we\u2019re in a position to help. Your thoughts?<\/p>\n

Patron of the Arts<\/p>\n

Dear Patron,<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Hopefully, your patronage will pay off. You\u2019re grateful to be in a position to help, and your older son is fortunate to be on the receiving end. It may be that this gives him the time and space he needs to create the kind of art he wants, to find an agent or a gallery and to kickstart his career. You have given him the luxury of time to pursue his dreams.\u00a0<\/p>\n

But you may also wish to revisit his progress at regular intervals. How long do you believe this is sustainable? Three years? Five years? Ten years? Every year he spends using your credit card and working on his art is a year that could yield dividends for your son and his artistic career, but it\u2019s also another year in which he has not achieved financial independence.<\/p>\n

If your son was 27 rather than 37, I might be less concerned about his long-term future. You can do so much to support him now, but you need to be realistic about where your support for his artistic career becomes detrimental to your son and his prospects of being financially solvent over the long term. Does he have any other sources of income, even as a plan B?<\/p>\n

You and your wife have a financially secure retirement. Fidelity Investments has a few rules of thumb: By 40, you should have three times your annual salary saved for retirement; by 50, you should have six times; by 60, you should have eight times; and by 67, you should have 10 times. Few people achieve that. Assuming you\u2019re in your 60s, you are doing better than most.<\/p>\n

But what about your son? Has he started to save for retirement? Are you his emergency fund? Is he relying on you for a down payment on a home? Most Americans think they\u2019ll need to save $1.27 million for retirement, yet they report having less than $90,000 on average in retirement savings, according to a report by Northwestern Mutual, a financial-services company.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re not going to run out of money by giving your son $12,000 per year in credit-card spending. But think about how you can assist him in other ways, too, including by helping him find a long-term path that will allow him to achieve what you have done during your lifetime \u2014 a path that allows him to live independently and plan for his own retirement.\u00a0<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n<\/figure><\/div>\n

Readers write to me with all sorts of dilemmas.\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

By emailing your questions, you agree to have them published anonymously on MarketWatch. By submitting your story to Dow Jones & Co., the publisher of MarketWatch, you understand and agree that we may use your story, or versions of it, in all media and platforms, including via third parties<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

The Moneyist regrets he cannot reply to questions individually.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

More from Quentin Fottrell:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Do children get 529 accounts in a divorce? My in-laws opened two plans for our kids, but their marriage is on the rocks.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I\u2019m only interested in zero risk\u2019: I\u2019m inheriting $100,000. Is a 5.5% CD a good rate? Where else should I invest?<\/p>\n

My sister squandered our parents\u2019 millions, asked me to give her $10,000, then made me a tempting offer. Should I take it?<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Read the full article here<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The older one is an artist who we partially support. He puts about $1,000 a month on our credit card, and we send him money as […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6207,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-6206","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-finance"},"yoast_head":"\nOur older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair? | Prosfunds<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair? | Prosfunds\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Prosfunds\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/09\/1693738558_social.jpeg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1280\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"640\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"News Room\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"News Room\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"News Room\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bab8f1b00ccebe43e39ff640793108e6\"},\"headline\":\"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair?\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\"},\"wordCount\":681,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#organization\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Finance\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\",\"name\":\"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair? | Prosfunds\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00\",\"description\":\"Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair?\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/\",\"name\":\"Funding Factories\",\"description\":\"Latest Finance News and Updates\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Funding Factories\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/ff-dark-logo-1.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/ff-dark-logo-1.png\",\"width\":780,\"height\":140,\"caption\":\"Funding Factories\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"}},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bab8f1b00ccebe43e39ff640793108e6\",\"name\":\"News Room\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/avatar_user_1_1693518183-96x96.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/avatar_user_1_1693518183-96x96.png\",\"caption\":\"News Room\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?author=1\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair? | Prosfunds","description":"Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair? | Prosfunds","og_description":"Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The","og_url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206","og_site_name":"Prosfunds","article_published_time":"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1280,"height":640,"url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/09\/1693738558_social.jpeg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"News Room","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"News Room","Est. reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206"},"author":{"name":"News Room","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bab8f1b00ccebe43e39ff640793108e6"},"headline":"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair?","datePublished":"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00","dateModified":"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206"},"wordCount":681,"commentCount":0,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#organization"},"articleSection":["Finance"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206","url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206","name":"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair? | Prosfunds","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00","dateModified":"2023-09-03T10:55:58+00:00","description":"Dear Quentin, My wife and I are retired, with a comfortable income of $114,000 per year and $2.3 million in IRAs. Our sons are 37 and 35 years old. The","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?p=6206#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Our older son, 37, is an artist and puts $1,000 a month on our credit card. Our other son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair?"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/","name":"Funding Factories","description":"Latest Finance News and Updates","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#organization","name":"Funding Factories","url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/ff-dark-logo-1.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/ff-dark-logo-1.png","width":780,"height":140,"caption":"Funding Factories"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"}},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/person\/bab8f1b00ccebe43e39ff640793108e6","name":"News Room","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/avatar_user_1_1693518183-96x96.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/avatar_user_1_1693518183-96x96.png","caption":"News Room"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/prosfunds.com"],"url":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/?author=1"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6206","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6206"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6206\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6208,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6206\/revisions\/6208"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6207"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6206"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6206"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prosfunds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6206"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}